Toki Tover Dot Com

Have you ever been told at any point in your life, that “you can’t be successful”?

This is a horrible thing to have happen to a person, especially when that person actually believes it. You know, your beliefs can basically shaped how you interact with people.
And that is such a huge piece of knowledge to get at in an intuitive sense.  That if you believe something, it is going to shape how you interact with people.  So, if your belief structure and your belief systems are: “I can’t do this, I suck!” – “You know, I’m not good enough to create success.” – or you know — “Nobody ever believed in me, I can’t do this — what have I ever done?” — that is going to shape how you interact with people.

I think that there’s this common theme that has really been touched upon… the focus is that this is about growth.  That all the people who are reading this right now are all people who at one point couldn’t sponsor someone if their life depended on it.  That we actually repel the people away from us.  I remember when I first got in this industry, I was like a repellent. I was not an attractor… I was a repellent… everybody came in my presence wanted to run.  That’s how I was when I first got into this industry.

I didn’t even realize the subconscious beliefs of what was happening… I didn’t realize what it was that I was putting off to people.  I didn’t realize that it was all these subconscious things that were going on within me that were causing me to push people away,  that were causing me to be needy… causing me to be dependent.

But the general theme of where I am going today and what I want for you is to change the focus.

Let’s have your focus actually start looking inward.

Let’s change your focus from being ‘out here’ to this thing over there, or that thing, or this prospect, or what’s happening in life–let’s just stop that right now.  As you’re reading this, you’re just ’stopping’ your focus being anything else outside of you.  You’re just stopping your focus being anywhere else–and your focus and where your attention is being turned to, and where it’s being re-directed to, is inward.

All of a sudden you’re looking inward and your attention is just starting to settle inside of you so that you can just let your feelings start to come up.  You can let whatever is going on inside of you right now just start to come up.  Because what I didn’t realize is that all the things that were happening in my life was affecting my ability to communicate.  They were affecting my ability to be attractive.

I didn’t realize that if something was going on in my life that I wasn’t dealing with… like, let’s say I just broke up with my boyfriend, and I’m miserable–I’m pissed, I’m sad, I’m depressed–and I’m not dealing with this… all of a sudden there is all of these things going on.  There’s all these emotions, there’s these beliefs, there’s these thoughts… and I’m just trying to push them all away and go talk to this prospect–what do you think on a subconscious level is really going to start being communicated to that prospect?

You think they’re going to be able to pick up on some of the negativity, on some of the things that are happening within me that are possibly skewing how I communicate or possibly skewing how I come across to people?

The answer is, of course they are. That just doesn’t work that way with what’s going on in your life now… that actually works that way with everything that’s ever gone on in your life if you haven’t dealt with it.

So our kid is running around bouncing off the walls, he spills his milk, we turn around and we say– “What did you do!?  Why did you do that!?”  We don’t even realize it, it’s a subconscious thing.  But you want to know the message being communicated right there?

“YOU’RE bad.” We’re not saying “You’re bad”, but guess what’s being communicated on a subconscious emotional level?  You…are…bad.  And is it any wonder that if that continues for years, and years, and years in early childhood that a kid might form the perception of themselves that THEY are bad.

These types of things are, literally, if you look at what’s happening in our society right now, there’s a lot of lost-ness.  There’s drug abuse, there’s this, there’s that –where do these come from?  Why are people hurting, why are they suffering?  Why do they think they’re so bad?  Why don’t they value their life?  Why don’t they value other people?  Why don’t they care about themselves?

And this is where it comes from… it comes from this… these ethereal, emotional communications that happen all the time–that we don’t even realize that we go through, and that we grow up with, and I’m sure EVERY ONE of us knows exactly what I’m talking about right now.  We get it, we understand it, we went through things growing up and all this stuff that could have formed core beliefs about ourselves.

This isn’t about letting those core beliefs predominate.  This isn’t about, oh ‘Somebody did this to me’, ‘Somebody did that to me’, ‘I’m justified to have this belief about myself–I’m justified to have these beliefs about myself’.  Because guess what?  If I was wasting my life feeling like ‘Oh, no, I was the Bad Kid…’  and feeling like the Victim, and just wanting justification to continue my beliefs… I’d be… I’d be DUMB. The jokes not on them, the joke is on ME.

We are responsible.

‘Cause at the end of the day, it is US who chooses what we believe.  It is US who chooses whether we want to give reality to feeling bad, or feeling like we’re unworthy, or feeling like we’re not good enough; it is US that gives reality to that.  So the JOKE is on us; no one else.

When you know who you are, and when you’re really comfortable with who you are, you are naturally confident.

That ever-elusive thing called ‘posture’?

You know we hear it all the time in this industry, it’s called ‘posture’.  Posture, posture, posture. What is posture?  When somebody’s comfortable with who they are, they have ‘posture’,  They have confidence.  They naturally just come across to people in a certain way… so the message that I think I have now is not focused on the outside… but let’s teach people how to really create success in this industry… let’s teach people how to really be sponsoring geniuses, and be able to attract people to them–not by learning techniques, but by learning more about who they are.  By learning more about who they are, then naturally they can become empowered.

There is this mystery that makes us HUMAN.  And it’s such a beautiful mystery–it’s such an inspiring mystery–it’s so majestic that when I saw that, it was like I have this natural love for life.  I have a love for other people, I have a love for myself, I have a LOVE.  And that’s what I carry forward.  And that love is really a form of energy.  And that energy is empowering.  And now, I can sit down in front of a computer, and I’ve got all this energy, so you know what–I’m gonna’ excel!  I’m gonna’ learn marketing, I’m gonna’ learn ads, when I get on the phone and I’m talking to somebody, they hear energy, they hear passion and what I’m worth, they hear all this stuff.  But when you trace it back to it’s source, what it is, is the fact that I have a love for myself, I have a love for life.  And that’s the source, really, of the growth.